Ten Fail Proof Pick Up Lines for Fat Guys

10. Is that a cheeseburger in your pants? If so, I would like to get into your pants to get to that cheeseburger.

9. Are you busy tonight at 3:00 AM? Because I think Taco Bell is still open then. We could get some chalupas.

8. Did you fall from heaven? Because you could totally land on me and be OK because I’m fat.

7. I’m new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment? And also the lard factory because I’ll be going there A LOT.

6. Where have you been all my life? I know it’s not McDonald’s or Wendy’s or Arby’s or Hardee’s or White Castle or Kenny Rogers Roasters…cause that’s where I usually hang out.

5. Your dad must’ve been a baker, because you’ve got a nice set of buns…and I’d like to put my hot dog between them. That’s not a sexual innuendo. I carry a package of hot dogs with me wherever I go.

4. There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn’t have your number in it. It only has the number to Dominos, Pizza Hut, and the Crisco factory.

3. Was your father a thief? Because someone stole the stars and put them in your eyes. He also stole my spare mayonnaise packets.

2. If you were a laser, you’d be set on “stunning.” If you were a burrito, you’d be set on “eat.”

1. Do you want to go out sometime? Do you have a cheesesteak?


One Response to “Ten Fail Proof Pick Up Lines for Fat Guys”

  1. All of these are so insanely hot… I would fall for any one of those lines.. especially if the guy was DRIPPING with lard. 😉

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